Unoffendable

While I think the notion of becoming unoffendable is something important to seek, to hold onto, I’m not sure it’s something we’ll ever truly obtain. Perhaps that’s the point of it—to keep shooting for that mark, both knowing and understanding it will forever be an uphill climb worth fighting for.

In the endeavor to become unoffendable, it is the self-control of one’s thoughts or actions that will make the difference. The offenses will never disappear but always be prevalent; however, the outcome from such would be altered. But what does that look like? How does one get there?

It’s no new thought that to remove an emotion you must replace it. It’s impossible to think nothing at all, but it’s very possible and even imperative to replace those thoughts with another path. The heart behind taking offense is justice and loyalty to its cause. Justice is important in the world and in it’s important in the bible. The cases in which justice must be both advocated and established are those which fight for the voice of the unheard. The eyes for the unseen. The freedom for the oppressed. These causes are not only worth fighting for but actually the job of those with any voice at all. God is passionate about such causes and he cares deeply for justice.

He also cares immensely for people. He hates to see his people hurt, harmed, or wronged. He draws near to the brokenhearted, fights for those who are unable, and rewards consistently the humble. But where is the humility in retaliation? Where is the reward in taking vengeance and defense in our own hands when we are offended? This loyalty aspect is where the change must be made. And we must first ask ourselves, “where does my loyalty lie?”

We can never become so bound in loyalty to ourselves or even our loved ones that we fail to see the big picture. May we advocate when explanations are necessary? Absolutely. And I believe God will give us the words if and when it may come to that. In such situations, we would be advocating not for ourselves but for peace among believers. But more often than not, our immediate defense is simply anger. Anger over someone else’s opinions, actions, or anything that causes their words to bump our character and the things we hold dear. But why do we feel this need to come to such a strong defense of ourselves or even those closest to us unless our world has become so small that we miss God’s greater picture.

We must never become so loyal to ourselves and our own causes that we cease fighting the Lord’s. Causes such as unity among his people, justice for the truly oppressed, and the spread of his everlasting good news the gospel. Such things are worthy of our fight, but the rifts among even believers often are not. After all, how can we be so quick to grab up our pitchforks when Jesus so willingly laid down his heavenly crown to take up one of thorns? For the redemption of those who were actively shouting “crucify him!”

Jesus wasn’t interested in defending his own character but resolved to glorify his father in every assignment set before him. If anyone had reason to take up their pitchfork, it would have been the Son of God treated and cursed like a criminal; he instead took up his cross. If he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to although he was God, why do I think my own character is something to be defended even over peace and unity among the church? Why do we, redeemed and forgiven by Christ, think it necessary to be perceived as right in the eyes of the world? We can never become so loyal to ourselves that we forget to be loyal to God.

Why do we, redeemed and forgiven by Christ, think it necessary to be perceived as right in the eyes of the world? We can never become so loyal to ourselves that we forget to be loyal to God.

When we live in a state of being offended or allow bitterness to take hold, it is just another symptom of thinking this life is about us. No, in order to become unoffendable, we must be so lost in the causes of the church that we do not feel when other believers inside of it bump up against us. When they call to question our motives even though we seek also to follow the Spirit. In the process of becoming unoffendable, we must also cease being divisive. In a world of social media where every post has the potential to draw a line in the sand and each ‘like’ becomes a signature on a petition, we must hold no part in such. We can always find others to join in our commiserating if we so seek. Receiving attention to the cause or prompting others with our words to take up our defense doesn’t make it right. Feeling justified doesn’t make it holy. There are causes for anger and causes for fight, but it isn’t the anger we feel for our own causes but only those for the Lord. Choosing to fight our own causes and defend what honor we think we may have is like actively fighting against those of the Lord’s.

“Even to have such lawsuits with one another is a defeat for you. Why not just accept the injustice and leave it at that? Why not let yourselves be cheated? Instead, you yourselves are the ones who do wrong and cheat your own fellow believers.”

1 Corinthians 6:7-8 (NLT)

“Therefore I, a prisoner for serving the Lord, beg you to lead a life worthy of your calling, for you have been called by God. Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love. Make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace. For there is one body and one Spirit, just as you have been called to one glorious hope in the future.”

Ephesians 4:1-4 (NLT)

“And do not bring sorrow to God’s Holy Spirit by the way that you live. Remember, he has identified you as his own, guaranteeing that you will be saved on the day of redemption. Get ride of bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.”

Ephesians 4:30-32 (NLT)